Hiding, secrets and lies

Hiding, secrets and lies – ways of being or qualities that I leant from my mother. To survive my childhood I had to hide, keep secrets and lie. Sadly, I took these characteristics with me into adulthood. They became friends that I could rely on. From writing this piece, I can observe how lonely Lisa…

Arm in Arm

All my life, I craved physical touch from my mother who was unable to give or receive comfort. When we walked arm in arm, which we often did in her later years when she was struggling, I relished the contact, but felt the weight and burden of her. In this piece of writing, I have…

Push and Pull

It was always a ‘push’ and a ‘pull’ of feelings whenever I saw my mother. I had a sense of being pushed from behind, the hand between my shoulder blades encouraging me to meet my mother face on. But the person to person encounter never happened. The other part of me (the stronger, the weaker?),…

A new start

A new start to my blog! Writing helps me understand myself and discover who I am. My emotional development as a child and in my adult life up until my mother passed away, was thwarted by the invisible power she had over me. I carried her shame. In this piece of writing, I can see…

Grasping the moment

Blogging 101 gave us the weekend off, but encouraged us to consider our blog, use the reader and generally make some progress. As I floated along on a tide of wellbeing this weekend, I had some inspirational thoughts for blogging, but didn’t grasp the moment, write and post. Now, as I have settled down to…

Too much choice?

Blogging 101 suggests we try out different ‘themes’ for our blog. Well, I have spent the last hour reviewing the many and varied themes available and have finally settled on ‘Misty Lake’ (I think!). Whilst I agree it’s good to have options, I also think that too much choice can cause unnecessary anxiety. For me,…

Feeling Small

Today Blogging 101 asks us to publish a post written with our ideal reader in mind. Hmmm an interesting thought. My ideal reader is someone who is willing to engage, either through contact (liking, commenting) or who feels compelled to consider my words carefully and wonder about me and why I have written what I’ve…

Connecting with others

Day 3 of Blogging 101 asked that we add 5 topics into our Reader and select 5 other bloggers to follow. Felt a bit like I had to do this, rather than wanted to. I guess the only reason I have done the exercise, is to keep up with the tasks – I don’t want…

Feeling empowered

I’ve just changed my tagline (for the 2nd assignment from Blogging 101) to reflect what I feel my blog is really about. I’m feeling empowered.

Feeling apprehensive!

Hello Everyone, I’m Lyndy and this is my very first blog post. I’m feeling apprehensive because speaking out publicly and having a voice is so alien to me. This is as a direct consequence of my childhood and how I was brought up. I was ‘silenced’ and ‘squashed’ by my mother and had to carry…